Tracy-Ann Oberman: “Passive-aggression is irritating . . . Just come out with what you mean!”

What is your earliest memory?Being in a cot on wheels and working out I could buck it along the wooden floor. My mum coming in and telling me to go to sleep and, the minute she’d gone, going back to bucking it along.

Who was or still is your mentor? I come from a family originally from the Pale of Settlement. Going into acting or the arts isn’t the dream choice of any immigrant family, but my aunt Wendy was adamant that it was possible and was very supportive. My mum, because she’s such an honourable, good, positive person. She refuses to be bowed by life. When I was at university, I went to the Edinburgh Festival in an Arnold Wesker play called The Merchant, and Arnold said: “You should do this professionally.” He really encouraged me.

How fit are you?Quite fit. I’ve got joint problems with my ankles and knees. I try and go to the gym a couple of times a week and I do a lot of rehab training.

Tell me about an animal you have loved.Our dog Scruffy, a miniature schnauzer. I so didn’t want a dog. We already had a cat that everybody was scared of. Scruffy’s had the best impact on our life; he’s the calmest member of our family. He’s so sweet-natured, he never barks. He’s got this little face that always looks as though he’s about to burst into tears and a slightly wonky smile.

Risk or caution, which has defined your life more?A healthy mixture of both. I will take calculated risks — not risk with abandon, because that’s foolish. Everybody has to take risks, otherwise life can’t surprise you.

What trait do you find most irritating in others?Passive aggression, you don’t know what people are really saying or what they mean. I’m not very good at sifting through the hidden agenda. I would rather pure aggression. Just come out with what you mean!

What trait do you find most irritating in yourself?I’m chronically 10 minutes late for everything.

What drives you on?A lot of members of our family died very young. We come from a background where the Holocaust was discussed a lot — and death. I want to seize life with both hands, always be learning, always be reaching and never get complacent.

Do you believe in an afterlife?I do. I can’t explain it, but I do think that there are more things in heaven and Earth, Horatio . . . 

Which is more puzzling, the existence of suffering or its frequent absence?The existence of suffering, because we are the only mammals that are conscious of our own mortality. You would have thought that, rather than just consuming more to push away the fear of death, illness and loss, an evolutionary gene would have made us more able to cope with the pain, or less aware of it.

Name your favourite river.The Avon. I was a real city girl, then my first job after drama school was with the Royal Shakespeare Company in Stratford-upon-Avon. I lived on the waterside. I loved that river: you could see the seasons change, the little cygnets being born and growing.

What would you have done differently?I don’t believe in regrets. I think everything evolves exactly as it’s meant to.

Tracy-Ann Oberman stars as Shylock in “The Merchant of Venice 1936” at Watford Palace Theatre until March 11; watfordpalacetheatre.co.uk

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