Seven Hilarious Quotes From ESPN’s Latest Story About Daniel Snyder

New exposé on the Daniel Snyder mess in Washington just dropped. ESPN’s Seth Wickersham, Don Van Natta Jr. and Tisha Thompson published a new story about the Washington Commanders owner this morning alleging that Snyder has “dirt” on commissioner Roger Goodell and a number of other NFL owners. The gist is that no one in the NFL likes Snyder, trusts him, or wants him to retain ownership of his team. And Snyder has allegedly dug up enough dirt that he thinks he can destroy some owners and even the commissioner. It’s intriguing, interesting and not very surprising. We’ve compiled some of the best lines from the piece below.

That’s Dan Snyder.

Snyder recently told someone that the NFL was like a mafia and that all the owners hate each other. Upon hearing this, another owner explained it was actually Snyder that everyone hated. Or, as Raylan Givens would put it…

As cornered as one can be while sailing around the world avoiding subpoena.

Super spooky. That’s some high-level paranoid thinking.

That’s a first impression Snyder made to one NFL owner about two decades ago.

Something Snyder says “half-jokingly” to staff according to a former team executive.

That’s what another team owner said upon hearing that Snyder thought all he needed for all his problems to go away was a marquee quarterback. Despite saying he was stepping back from football decisions, the Wentz trade is being put directly on Snyder. To be fair, the coach feels the same way.