Just when we Zappe Fever was out, it pulls us back in | What Happened?

What happened in the New England Patriots game today? Here’s everything you need to know about their 38-3 loss to the Dallas Cowboys:

– The Patriots got their butts kicked. Mac Jones played a terrible game and got benched for Bailey Zappe. You can stop reading here if you want. I won’t be offended. That’s everything you really need to know.

– Zappe Fever has returned. Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in!

– The Patriots walked away from last week’s win over the New York Jets with the luxury of being able to say “Hey, we’ve got issues, but at least our quarterback isn’t melting down like Zach Wilson.” Well after Jones’ meltdown on Sunday, they can’t say that anymore.

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– Jones and the Patriots had one good drive to start the game before the wheels came off. There was a strip-sack, a pick-six and another pick. Jones finished the game with an ugly three-and-out where FOX color commentator Greg Olson ripped Jones for missing a wide-open receiver underneath. Instead, Jones sailed the ball high and uncatchable.

– That was the last we saw of Jones. Zappe took over at quarterback in the closing minutes of the third quarter. Jones’ final numbers: 12-of-21 for 150 yards and 2 interceptions. That’s a passer rating of 39.9.

– Jones completed three passes to Hunter Henry. The tight end was the only Patriots player to catch more passes from Jones than Cowboys defensive back DaRon Bland (who had two picks).

– Against all odds, Zappe is back. It’s a far cry from the situation at the end of training camp when Zappe was unexpectedly cut before landing on the practice squad.

– We’re now back where we left off about a year ago when Jones went down with an ankle injury. Zappe has another chance to step in and look like the savior at quarterback. This time, it’s Jones leaving the game with a performance-based meltdown.

– Did Zappe look like a world-beater? No. But that was unlikely to happen in a blowout like this.

– Did Zappe turn the ball over three times, including two that resulted in defensive touchdowns? Also no, and that was the important part. As long as Zappe didn’t commit an actual felony offense on national television, he was going to look better than Jones.

– With that said, Zappe did have some nice throws. He hit Bourne over the middle for a big gain. He lofted a nice back-shoulder pass to DeVante Parker under pressure. It’s the type of throw Jones has struggled to hit all year.

– Hey, remember when a big storyline heading into this game was Ezekiel Elliott’s return to Dallas? Yeah, that got buried quickly Elliott came into the game on the Patriots’ second drive — as per usual. But his touches were limited in this one.

– This may sound crazy considering the score, but I think the Patriots defense played pretty well for most of the game. With Jack Jones, Jonathan Jones and eventually Christian Gonzalez all injured, this unit did a good job of limiting a potent Cowboys offense. The lopsided point total on the scoreboard was more a result of the offense.

– The defense’s worst play of the game was when they let up a 54-yard run by KaVontae Turpin on an end-around. Myles Bryant punched the ball out with an impressive chase-down tackle. However, the ball wasn’t bouncing New England’s way all night. The Cowboys fell on it.

– Speaking of injuries, Gonzalez left the game early with a shoulder injury. Then there was more bad news: Matthew Judon left the game in the fourth quarter with an upper-body injury. He was ruled as doubtful to return with an elbow injury. Safety Jabrill Peppers also appeared to be hurt on the sidelines.

– Jahlani Tavai spoke for a lot of Patriots fans when a hot mic caught what he had to say after almost getting an interception. He dropped an F-bomb.