Browns GM Andrew Berry on trying to find the right order for our lives – Terry Pluto’s Faith & You

CLEVELAND, Ohio – Browns general manager Andrew Berry spoke at the NFl Draft Combine on Tuesday.

The usual topics were discussed: Deshaun Watson’s shoulder surgery, Nick Chubb’s knee and his contract, changes to the coaching staff.

Then Berry was asked if he was impacted by anything he’s recently read.

“I wouldn’t necessarily say a book that played into my philosophy as a general manager, ” he said. “In terms of my personal life and professional career, there’s a book called ‘Ordering Your Private World’ by Gordon MacDonald. It’s actually something my pastor recommended to me a couple years ago.”

I read his comment and thought, “I read that book years ago.”

MacDonald’s book was originally released in 1985. It became a bestseller, especially in Christian circles.

“It really totally changed my approach in terms of balancing the personal and professional constraints or weights that come with trying to be a general manager, trying to be a good husband and be a good father and all those things,” Berry said. “That really had a huge impact on my life.”

One of the themes of the book is something I struggle with: Keeping my faith real.

Or as MacDonald wrote: “A soul – our spiritual place – is empty when one tries to do soul-based things but makes little or no effort to keep that soul filled.”

I write a faith column each week. I also prepare two Biblically-based messages each month to be given at Akron’s Haven of Rest city mission. I write a two-page outline to be given to the guys, along with a copies of my faith columns.

That means I’m often looking for faith topics. I watch and listen to pastors and priests preach. I read and research material to help with my faith writings and outlines.

But as MacDonald wrote, “A soul is empty when one tries to do soul-based things but makes little or no effort to keep that soul filled.”

I have to be careful, or I can treat the faith stories and messages much like researching and writing about the Browns’ approach to free agency, or if the Cavs can shake off their 2023 playoff failure.

A fog of busyness can hang over our lives. Photo By Lu Ying / Special to Advance Local.Lu Ying

THE CURSE OF BUSYNESS

Berry spoke at Journey Church in Fairview on June 20, 2023. It was a Father’s Day talk with Pastor Jim Wilkes, who gave Berry the book. I found the interview online, and it brought to mind another story.

A former NBA coach told me how even in the summer when there were no games, practices or meetings with fellow coaches … he still couldn’t stop thinking about his team.

He’d watch his kids play little league and soccer, but his mind was elsewhere. He wasn’t sure what he was watching. This was before cellphones became energy-and-attention vampires, pulling us away from the people we love.

At the church, Berry mentioned the struggle to connect with his wife and three children after coming home from work. His mind would be swirling about whatever crisis the Browns had that day.

Any GM, any supervisor, any teacher … nearly anyone can relate. The book led Berry to trying to shut out the football business while driving home by listening to music or perhaps a faith-based podcast. Sometimes, it was silence for a few minutes before walking into the house.

“Driven people boast of their drivenness,” wrote MacDonald. “They have forgotten how to play. Spiritual activity seems a waste of time. They are usually too busy for the pursuit of ordinary relationships in marriage, family or friendship … not to speak of one with God.”

THE CELLPHONES & US

MacDonald’s point is that busyness is an addiction, and cellphones often are the busy drugs of choice. It can make us feel important.

Why is it so tempting to stare at the cellphone for hours? Some people can’t work out without checking the cellphone every few minutes – and texting someone – while sitting on an exercise machine.

My wife and I recently went out to eat. A young couple was there with two young children. As they waited for their food, the adults were riveted to their cellphones. The two children each had an I-Pad, and they were watching something.

I watch this stuff and think, “We are losing the ability to talk to each other. We’ve surrendered that to the cellphones and internet.”

In his talk at Journey Church, Berry mentioned how he hands his cellphone to his wife Brittan when he comes home. She can check out the texts, etc., only giving it back to him if it’s an emergency.

Meanwhile, Berry has focused time to play with their three young children, giving his wife a break.

We need to put what matters most first. My 98-year-old “mom” Melva Hardison is in a nursing home. For the last six years, I have stopped there early in the morning about five days a week for a short visit – before going to work. Berry mentioned how he started taking his kids to school in the morning to make sure he connected with them.

Yes, we need time alone to think and to listen to the sounds of silence. Photo by Lu Ying / Special to Advance Local.Lu Ying

WHAT MATTERS MOST

MacDonald wrote: “Because driven people rarely think they have accomplished enough, they seize every available minute to attend more meetings, to study more material and to initiate more projects … they attempt to impress people with the fullness of their schedules.”

I remember a college coach once telling me, “I keep thinking if I’m not working, then another coach is working harder to beat me.”

And the coach feared that would happen. He’d rather sleep in the office than go home. Or he’d pop in a game video to scout after spending a few minutes with his family.

Berry was attracted to the book for the same reason it caught my attention years ago. It spoke to the heart … as in the heart of the problem of stress in many of our lives … and our need to develop a heart for God and others.