A weary nation breathes a sigh of relief as James Corden welcomed back at Balthazar

© Photo: Ian Tuttle James Corden

Well, that certainly was a close one. Yesterday afternoon, America dripped with sweat as the host of The Late Late Show and a participant in that embarrassing Cinderella traffic jam was banned from New York-based fancy pants restaurant Balthazar for approximately five minutes. Thankfully, he apologized to Balthazar owner Keith McNally for allegedly being “a hugely gifted comedian, but a tiny cretin of a man” and is now welcome back with open arms.

The tense stand-off between one of New York’s most famous restaurateurs and one of America’s most confusing success stories began when McNally called Corden “the most abusive customer to my Balthazar servers since the restaurant opened 25 years ago,” posting on Instagram that Corden would no longer be welcome.

McNally’s first accusation states that Corden found hair in his food. After showing the hair to Balthazar’s manager, he demanded that they “Get us another round of drinks this second,“ McNally recalls Corden saying. “And also take care of all of our drinks so far. This way, I [won’t] write any nasty reviews on Yelp or anything like that.” It’s hard to imagine James Corden taking a break from singing in cars with celebrities to write a Yelp review, but the threat is enough.

Manager’s report no. 2 is a little more involved. During one visit, Corden’s wife “ordered an egg yolk omelet with gruyere cheese and salad.” Shortly after the food arrived, Corden called the server to tell her that “there was a little bit of egg white mixed with the egg yolk.” When the kitchen remade the dish, they accidentally sent it with home fries instead of salad. “That’s when James Corden began yelling like crazy to the server: ‘You can’t do your job! You can’t do your job! Maybe I should go into the kitchen and cook the omelet myself!’” But as they say, you can’t make an omelet without abusing someone working for tips.

After receiving an apology from Corden by phone, McNally decided what’s a few egg whites between friends. McNally “strongly believes in second chances,” which presumably is why he’s so into posting about Woody Allen, Ghislaine Maxwell, and Jeffrey Epstein. He writes, “Anyone magnanimous enough to apologize to a deadbeat layabout like me (and my staff) doesn’t deserve to be banned from anywhere. Especially Balthazar. So Come Back to the 5 & Dime, Jimmy Corden, Jimmy Corden. All is Forgiven.”

Ah, the rich and famous. How do they stay so rich and famous?