December 25, 2024

Maria Bamford Is Particular About What You Put in the Little Free Library

Bamford #Bamford

Money, prestige and fame were deciding factors when the comedian Maria Bamford first considered writing about herself. So was having an authority figure ask her to do something. “Simon & Schuster said, ‘We’ll pay you $150,000,’” she recalled. “I said, ‘Wow, this is a dream I didn’t even know I had coming.’”

In “Sure, I’ll Join Your Cult” — subtitled “A Memoir of Mental Illness and the Quest to Belong Anywhere,” published in September — Bamford digs into bipolar II disorder, suicidal thoughts, psychiatric wards and 12-step programs that already inspire her stand-up comedy. And adds recipes.

“Cooking to me, because I don’t enjoy it, is emotional,” she said. “There’s a process for me in anything where I feel like I’ve done it wrong.”

But self-exposure wasn’t the difficult part. “No one is laughing when you’re typing,” Bamford said. “When it’s stand-up, I get to say whatever I want and no one gets to tell me anything. But with writing, someone will say, ‘Hey, why don’t you flesh out that part?’ Then you have the emotional response of, ‘Ohhhh godddd, how dare you speak of my baby.’”

In a call from Los Angeles, where she lives, Bamford talked about what keeps her afloat: Debtors Anonymous meetings, little libraries and pool time. These are edited excerpts from the conversation.

1

Comedy Open Mics

You get to hear from people who have all sorts of different experiences, especially in bigger cities. My current favorite is at 9 p.m. on Mondays at Public Displays of Altadena, geographically attractive and clown-positive.

2

Debtors Anonymous

Fun, free and all about the debit card! I’ve been a very secret member for 29 years. I love the cognitive behavioral aspect of it, the harm reduction of these 90 minutes on a Saturday, I’m not alone on my phone with my shopping cart full of clogs.

3

Little Free Libraries, but Curated

They’re treasure boxes of new-to-you literature, and we have one on our front lawn. You don’t know when somebody’s going to drop something off that you’ve never read. There is the danger of being Dan Browned. Don’t do it. Take out your own trash. And sometimes it can feel like an assault. Somebody left six Bill O’Reilly tomes in our book nook.

4

Old Pugs

I like a dog who’s been around the block and has no desire to go around it again. With pugs, it’s very clear that they like you. They’re very affectionate and they want to be next to you. I don’t want to be confused about where my dog stands. Ours are from Pug Nation Rescue in Los Angeles.

5

White Elephant Gifts

Just anything that has no worth except meaning or the thought. If you have a story behind handing me a filthy wad of Kleenex and why you thought to bring it to me, that is my favorite. Please do not spend money. Write me a narrative behind the water-damaged Furby you’ve dropped at my feet.

6

IRL Interaction at Coffee Shops

There is less of it due to my own addiction to phones and nitro cold brew, but anytime I have some, it is generally energizing. I do appreciate the enormous value of chitchat in that it really makes my life meaningful to know what my barista Ruth thinks her cat Stanley is doing right now.

7

Gas Station Notebooks and Pens

I think it’s just wonderful that people want to still write stuff down. And it’s a real comfort to know where I can get a notebook and a pen to write things with.

8

My Sister

She has been a pathologist, an author, a life coach, a shaman, a mother of four and now a fine artist. She is the best.

9

Parties

You never know in L.A. if only one person or 78 people are going to show up, and it’s exciting. During a hypomanic episode, I once invited everyone I had ever emailed to my home. The mail man — in his uniform — attended and brought Crown Royal in a velvet bag. You never know who is going to come when you message a group text: All are welcome, no need to ask.

10

Pool Time With My Husband

We have a few pool gags that we repeat for guests — a fake cellphone dropped in the deep end, skits that involve giving a person advice about their career and then falling into the water before the advice comes. For example, “Maria, you should get on that podcast with Joe Rog— —” Fall in pool.

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