Gianni Infantino and the difficult second monologue

THERE HE IS

Today Gianni Infantino feels late. He kept the hordes waiting for his much-anticipated Human Rights World Cup exit press conference for an hour. Football Daily’s popcorn had gone cold by the time he took to his throne. Infantino must have spent those final few moments perfecting lines to see how he could rework his “I feel gay” routine from the start of the tournament. Maybe he was making sure he had the latest numbers for migrant workers’ deaths in Qatar absolutely spot on, especially considering how vague he has been on the matter thus far.

The reason given for an inability to be punctual was put down to a Fifa Council meeting overrunning. Palm greasing is not a speedy business. In the end, he decided against a 45-minute monologue about feeling the pain of discrimination due to his red hair, instead rambling through some statistics about attendances, while ignoring the empty seats, and broadcast viewers worldwide.

The good news for Infantino is that the Fifa Council unanimously decided this has been the “best World Cup ever”, before praising the “cohesive power” of football. That good old uniting nature of sport by stopping people from wearing rainbows on their clothing and suppressing the support for Iranian women in the stands. But do not fear, Infantino praised the “joyful atmosphere”.

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The key point to take away from Fifa’s head honcho is that people do not want to be reminded of discrimination in the world and human rights abuses via the momentous nature of attaching a multi-coloured armband to a millionaire sportsperson. “Those fans who come to the stadium and billions watching on TV have their own problems and just want to spend 90 minutes without having to think about anything else. Just enjoy a little moment of joy,” Infantino spluttered. It is good to know that football can be “cohesive”, just as long as the people who play and watch it ignore the deaths, discrimination, human rights abuses and corruption involved in hosting this tournament. Today Football Daily feels shocked.

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QUOTE OF THE DAY

“[Kingsley] Coman also had a fever this morning. In Doha, the temperatures have dropped a bit and you still have air conditioning on all the time. We have had a few cases of flu-like symptoms. We are trying to be careful so that it does not spread and the players have put in a great effort on the pitch and obviously their immune systems suffer” – France boss Didier Deschamps reckons he might not be having to deal with sick-knack in his squad before Sunday’s final against Argentina if organisers just switched the air-con off.

In 1996, Manchester United changed their kit after the half-time cuppa at Southampton because the grey ensemble put them off the business of the day. This explains why England and Germany are out and France and Argentina are through to the HRWC final. England’s costume with its shoulder detail was devastatingly distracting, while the Germans’ big black stripe made them human credit cards. Argentina has stuck to trusted tradition while the French belong on a Paris catwalk” – Lindsay Williams. Not sure about those buttoned necks, mind. Photograph: Fifa/Getty Images After a lot of research, I’ve found a charity which directly supports Qatar’s migrant workers and their families. If anyone wants to donate to it after enjoying the HRWC, the link is equidem.org/donate. Thank you” – Mark Foster.

Send your letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’ the day is … Mark Foster.

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