Twitter Users Greet New Overlord Elon Musk By Roasting Him Alive

Contrary to popular belief, Twitter can sometimes be a very warm place — scorching, even.

It’s not totally clear what Musk, a South African-born billionaire with a penchant for rockets, Burning Man and truly weird baby names, plans to do with the platform. But one thing he’s been emphatic about is that he believes in free speech.

I hope that even my worst critics remain on Twitter, because that is what free speech means

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) April 25, 2022

Considering that Musk frequently uses Twitter to make bad jokes and complain about “wokeness,” many of his critics are concerned that his promise to preserve the First Amendment will lead to the further spread of misinformation, propaganda and hate speech in the name of profitability. (Not that anyone would accuse the head of Tesla, a company that’s faced multiple discrimination lawsuits, of not always having people’s best interests at heart.)

Some Democratic lawmakers are worried that under Musk, Twitter would reinstate the account of former President Donald Trump, who was suspended after his supporters’ deadly attack on the U.S. Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021.

In fact, these concerns are just scratching the surface of what the richest man in the world is capable of doing with a platform that’s repeatedly demonstrated its power to cause social chaos. But before Musk turns the whole thing into a subscription-based service where users have to pay in cryptocurrency, NFTs or James Bond memorabilia, here are a few jokes about Musk acquiring Twitter. Read them before they get mysteriously deleted.

hi guys it’s Elon 🤪 (i can do this from any account now. maybe you will be next…)

— Dana Donnelly (@danadonnelly) April 26, 2022

what if elon buys twitter and then rips off his face to reveal he is mark zuckerberg in disguise

— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) April 25, 2022

elon musk really bought twitter for $45 billion when i got that shіt for free on the app store

— kira 👾 (@kirawontmiss) April 25, 2022

elon musk spending $43 billion to stop getting bullied on twitter when he could’ve simply been less annoying is insane

— first-mate prance (@bocxtop) April 25, 2022

elon musk coulda made an iron man suit wit $44 billion but bought twitter instead

— juju 💰 (@ihyjuju) April 25, 2022

BREAKING: World’s biggest clown purchases world’s largest circus

— Reuters Pitchbot (Satire) (@ReutersPitchbot) April 25, 2022

Remember like two weeks ago when Elon was like “tell me how to end world hunger and I’ll do it” and then he bought twitter for $44 billion instead

— river butcher 🤠 (@rivbutcher) April 25, 2022

putting pronouns in my bio and 45 seconds later a tesla on autopilot crashes through my living room window

— LeVar Burzum (@weadhitter) April 25, 2022

people worried Elon Musk will ruin Twitter, a website whose major accomplishments over 16 years are creating then destroying Chrissy Teigen and getting Brooklyn Nine-Nine a 6th season

— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) April 25, 2022

elon musk spending $44 billion on an app where a shrimp fried this rice goes viral every week

— myesha thee stallion (@myeshachou) April 25, 2022

It’s 2028, I’m in my Amazon mood boost booth, injecting Amazon speed as I pee in Amazon relief briefs. I check my rebreather mask & quickly type “i love president bezos” into Twitla (elon musk twitter) via my Amazon work-social portal. I get 800 epics, which I exchange for oxygen

— Diana (@rlycalm) April 4, 2022

I have a the apartheid a money!! Mamma mia!!

— Posting Italian Elon Musk until he sells this site (@lesbiaudrey) April 25, 2022

Why can’t billionaires do something useful like get One Direction back together

— abby (@abbyluschei) April 25, 2022

I hope a weird guy doesn’t buy Email

— Brooks Otterlake (@i_zzzzzz) April 25, 2022

If Elon Musk buys twitter I’m moving to Canada

— Katie Herzog (@kittypurrzog) April 25, 2022

If Canada buys Elon Musk I am moving to Twitter

— Jesse Singal (@jessesingal) April 25, 2022