Pinay mums on being stage mothers: ‘It’s tough work, but enjoyable’

At a very young age, both of Beth Lofthouse and Jhaine Estorque’s daughters had already been joining beauty pageants. It’s tough work having to be constantly on-the-go with their events, but went “all-out” to support each of their child.

“She started when she was 4 years old with a pageant called Follow your dreams. Chloe was very shy when she was little that’s why I let her join pageants, so she would gain confidence,” reveals Mrs Lofthouse.

Highlights

Beth Lofthouse: Separated from her own mother for a long time

Beth Lofthouse had long been separated from her own mother before they were reunited. Now that Beth is a mother, her support for her child is unparalleled.

“I will not let my family get separated,” stresses Mrs Lofthouse.

In 2000, the computer programming graduate came to Australia with the help of her mother whom she had long been separated from and was already living in Sydney.

“Ini-sponsor ako ng nanay ko. Dito ko na rin nakilala ‘yung husband ko. Dito ako nagbagong buhay,” recalls the mum from Sydney.

At first, not everything was easy for Beth, particularly in trying to find work.

“I started as a volunteer. I first volunteered at St Vincent’s charity as a merchandiser and also a cashier. I also volunteer for data-entry. And then I started working at the hotel, as a housekeeper in Darling Harbor. That was my first job with pay.”

Apart from the new life she’s trying to carve for herself, it was also a big adjustment as she rebuilds her relationship with her own mother who was away from her for a long time.

When Beth Lofthouse finally had her own child, she promised herself that she would do everything for the child.

Mrs Lofthouse was very supportive of her only daughter, Chloe – in her studies, beauty pageant journey and other community activties.

“Yes, I’m a stage mum. Hindi lang ako ang nagsasabi kahit ‘yung ibang mothers. Sino pa ba ang magiging stage mum niya kundi ako. Saka for her own din naman ang ginagawa ko,” she affirms.

Beth Lofthouse’s now 7-year-old daughter, Chloe, strutting her beauty pageant titles

Left photo by Katherine Musgrave Studios; Right photo by Dave Choo as supplied by B Lofthouse

The 43-year old mum takes every opportunity she has to give her child the full support she needs as she believes the day will come when her child, Chloe, will be able to decide for herself.

“For now that she’s still young, I will support her all the way. Because you never know maybe when she grows up she doesn’t want this (activities) anymore and I won’t force her to. But for now I’m enjoying it. We both are enjoying what we do. ”

But despite the busy schedule of Beth’s daughter, she never forget to take some time our for herself.

“When my daughter is at school, I would take my ‘me-time’. Sometimes on Sundays when I just want to be alone, I relax. I go for a massage of have my nail polish done. Me and my husband also do weekend getaways sometimes.”

The Lofthouse when they went to the US for their daughter’s pageant.

Supplied by B Lofthouse

Jhaine Estorque: ‘A dream come true’

Jhaine Estorque hoped for a baby girl and so her husband. It was a dream come true for her when she gave birth to her daughter, now 6-year-old Maria Hall.

“Dream come true talaga para sa aming mag-asawa kasi pareho naming gusto ng anak na babae. Tapos mahilig din akong mag-ayos kaya para kang may barbie doll,” fondly shares the former child care educator.

 She stopped working after she gave birth as she wanted to focus on her daughter.

“Until when [Maria] was 18 months old, I stopped working, and then eventually, I went back to work part-time,” says the now Telemarketing Executive.

Jhaine Estorque carrying her daughter, Maria, when she was a baby (left photo); Maria poses with one of her pageant titles and crowns (right photo)

Supplied by Jhaine Estorque and Arvind Singh Photography

It was an easy and smooth journey for Jhaine taking care of her child. She even used her time looking for activities that they would both enjoy.

“We really started with Instagram. My daughter became brand ambassador and representative for some small businesses.”

With Jhaine’s passion for photography, she would often takes the photos that the small business would require from them

Maria was four years old when Jhaine first registered her to join Little Miss Earth Australia. And that was the beginning of Mrs Hall’s hectic schedules mostly pre-occupation with her daughter’s pageants, modelling  and competitions.

“Gusto ko kasing makita na mag-boost ‘yung self-confidence niya in the runway.”

“Naging very fun na hobby kasi ang dami naming nami-meet na mga mums na may same passion tulad namin. Mas nadagdagan ‘yung mga kaibigan namin.”

Jhaine Estorque (seated, 3rd from right) with other ‘mummygers’ (a group of mummies in-charge of their kids pageant journey) as headed by modelling coach and mum Tootsie Aceron.

Tootsieroll

Supportive ‘stage mums’

Although Beth Lofthouse and Jhaine Estorque both consider themselves as “stage mums”, they reiterate that they are doing whatever they can to guide their children on the right path and provide opportunities for them while they are still young.

“I told her (Maria), if you want to stop, just tell me and we will stop (with pageants and other activities),” says Jhaine Estorque.

“That’s why we do it because the kids enjoy it. And just in case they want to pursue this as a part-time career, she’s confident in the run way,” added Maria’s mother.

“We are only doing these because she is enjoying it. And Just in case they want to pursue this as a part-time career, confident na siya in the run way,” adds Maria Hall’s mum.

Mother’s Day “me-time”

They both agree that despite their busy schedules as mothers, it is still important that they have time for themselves. And Mother’s Day is a great time to take that ‘me-time’.

“It’s only once a year so let’s make the most of it,” encourages Mrs Lofthouse.

“For me, it’s going for a walk or run because I get the best of both worlds by exercising and quiet time for myself. But the best me-time for me is retail therapy. And I end up buying for stuff for my daughter and I enjoy it really,” shares Jhaine Estorque.

‘Me-time’. Jhaine Estorque and Beth Lofthouse on taking some time off for yourself.

Supplied by J Estorque & B Lofthouse

They also have some advice for stage mums like them. “Just be patient. Alam ko minsan mahirap maging stage mum pero ‘pag nakita nyo na ‘yung achievement ng anak nyo, you will feel very happy,” says Beth Lofthouse.

“You are all amazing for supporting the dreams and passion of your kids. Let’s enjoy the kids while they are youg and continue to make great memories. But as a mum, we should know our boundaries and not forget that our kids are watching all the time. Let us not be too overbearing as stage mums,” ends Mrs Hall. 

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